a small world, and then there's this little planet i stumbled into

i've been browsing through my facebook. looking through friends' profiles. snooping through uploaded photos.

first of all i noted how so many of my co-singletons way back in the late 90s and early 2000s are now either married, pregnant or raising little versions of themselves. even those individuals i never thought would venture into such a life-shift.

second i noted how so many of my friends are connected with all my other friends. either as batchmates, or workmates, or serendipitous connections such as marrying into the other's family. i pore through reunion photos, dinners, parties, celebrations, get-togethers. forever keeping in touch. forever together in some way.

and i remember how, when i was in grade school and well into my high school (and yes maybe even a wee bit into my college) i have always felt to be outside the orbit of these interconnected worlds. like i'm the post-it with the non-sticky glue.

and then now i realize how my life is all tangled up in this little planet i stumbled upon well outside of those worlds i have always floated in all these years of my existence.

well, true it is not entirely devoid of some kind of connection with my current universe but, being in this little planet is like taking a trip to the moon, or a spin into outer space. where the rules i have always played by no longer seem to apply and where the people i have to relate to strip me of words and reason. in this little planet i am a whole new being, broken out of my history and old limitations. it is not an easy place. always i get that itch to escape. and always i get that irresistible gravity pulling me back.

it's a little world that is mine. in a way. beyond everything else, every other world i have walked into. it is the world at the back of an old closet. the alley that opens only with certain words and certain taps on a brick wall. the wonderland. the enchanted village beyond the Wall.

riddled with labyrinths.