twilight

–noun

1.	the soft, diffused light from the sky when the sun is below the horizon, either from daybreak to sunrise or, more commonly, from sunset to nightfall.

2.	the period in the morning or, more commonly, in the evening during which this light prevails.

3.	a terminal period, esp. after full development, success, etc.: the twilight of his life.

4.	a state of uncertainty, vagueness, or gloom.

i have heard it said that people are most prone to sadness or depression at twilight, or that feelings of such are intensified during this time of day.

i would not be surprised to find it true. because there is something about the ending of a day with empty hands and an empty heart. and the knowing that you cannot recapture what has been lost.

today i was busy at work and i made progress on a number of tasks.

my mom messaged me and said that her doctor friend has already recommended that i seek some medical advice regarding my condition : my inability to eat, loss of appetite, insomnia and general down moods. i don't know if i will. i am hoping i can get through this on my own. although the idea of a quick fix sounds tempting. especially if it will mean i could numb this anxious ache inside me.