i am so totally over edward. i mean, seriously. like even if he asks me out now or tomorrow or next week or next month. there's a very very strong likelihood i will simply say no. unless i decide to do it gigi way and just keep on going out regardless. but the thing is, edward and me --- potentially disastrous. he can be a really good friend though.
last night, especially after the movie, was the final shoe to drop, so to speak. i cannot be with a person who is so drained of romance and hope and empathy and brimming with cynicism and just so... calcified with whatever it was that made him that way.
here's a funny exchange (approximated from memory), as he watched me slice my sandwich with much more force than usual.
edward: stop pretending that's my heart.
bella: i'm not pretending it's your heart. you don't have one.
edward: ah yes, thank you for reminding me.
bella: you don't have a heart. it has been crushed. crushed so badly it's all gone.
on the other hand, jacob is the one who makes me go gigi.
and i wish i'm his exception.
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